Thursday 13 February 2020
Ten Karaoke Songs for People Who Absolutely Cannot Sing
There are two types of people in this world. There are those, like my step-nan Jackie, who have to have the microphone prised from their clutches after yet another rambunctious rendition of La Bamba. And then there are those – the introverts, the fatally self-conscious and the simply godawful singers amongst us – who freeze with terror at the sheer mention of the dreaded K word: karaoke. This list is for the latter group.
Karaoke – arguably Japan’s greatest cultural export – doesn’t have to be a source of dread. In fact, research has shown that a good karaoke sesh has a surprising number of health benefits, including reduced stress levels, boosted endorphins and even a reduction in blood pressure. Not to mention, it’s just good fun. No one wants to be a spoilsport, so here’s a selection of great tunes you can sing along to shame-free at your next work party.
Shake it Off by Taylor Swift
Simple and upbeat, this modern karaoke classic is a real crowd pleaser. This one’s more about having a good time than delivering a powerhouse performance, so you can wow your audience with your fun-loving attitude if nothing else!
Livin’ La Vida Loca by Ricky Martin
Ditto this catchy little hit by the King of Latin Pop. Everyone will be having such a good time that your vocals are the last thing they’ll notice.
Islands in the Stream by Dolly Parton and Kenny Rogers
This is surprisingly easy to sing and requires a duet partner, so the heat won’t be all on you. It’s practically impossible to feel self-conscious with this classic feelgood tune.
Bubbly by Colbie Caillat
This is just such a sweet and simple song that anyone can sing. You shouldn’t have much trouble with this one.
Angels by Robbie Williams
You’ll get approximately two seconds into this song before everyone joins in and your voice gets drowned out, which makes it the perfect karaoke song for the tone deaf and timid.
Achy Breaky Heart by Billy Ray Cyrus
Or really any classic country song. Just put on an embarrassing Tennessee accent (even if you’re from Luton) and you’ll fool all your friends into thinking you’re a country prodigy.
Teenage Dirtbag by Wheatus
A guilty pleasure for basically everyone under 50, the vocals are pretty easy and you’ll have great fun performing it.
Waterloo by Abba
It is a truth universally acknowledged that no karaoke night is complete without at least one Abba song. Honestly, any of their songs are a pretty solid bet but, as someone who loves them both ironically and non-ironically, Waterloo is the perfect combo of fan favourite and easy to sing.
Up the Junction by Squeeze
The beauty of this song is that it can be 'sung' by pretty much anyone. It's a 'talkie' and to be honest, the worse your vocals, the more authentic it sounds.
Sumer Nights by John Travolta and Olivia Newton John
If my own experiences are anything to go by, you'll start this duet with one Sandy and one Danny. Pretty soon, though, the rest of your friends won't be able to resist adding to the numbers until you inevitably have two fully fledged groups, the Pink Ladies and the T-birds, both giving it all the sass they have. It doesn't matter if you're any good because that's not the point, you know?
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